“Don’t Reinvent the Wheel” and Other Web Developer Cop-outs

The Excuses

Don’t Reinvent the Wheel

Huzzah!!! I’m a PROGRAMMER!

That’s Premature Optimization!

But That Would Take Ten Times Longer To __Fill_In_The_Blank__

Millions of People Can’t Be Wrong!

Jane, you ignorant slut!

But We’ve Been Fine This Way For Years

My God man, drilling holes in his head is not the answer! The artery must be repaired! Now, put away your butcher’s knives and let me save this patient before it’s too late!

Visitors Don’t Care About How Well Coded It Is!

The People Impacted Aren’t In Our “Target Audience”

The only thing we can know for sure is that we have no idea who will visit the website or how they will do so.

Abraham Wald — a Hungarian Jewish Mathematician — saw the flaw in using information like that in the diagram above on where to reinforce and armor warplanes.

But We Need An Engaging User Experience

People don’t visit websites for the fancy layouts or graphics you hang around the content. They visit for the CONTENT! — Dan Schulz (RIP)

Well You Clearly Never Worked On “Real” Projects

It’s not what you said, but how you said it!

There’s nothing wrong with sex and violence so long as nobody uses any naughty words! — Sheila Broflovski

Industry Buzzwords, Another Warning Sign

Conclusion — Do Your Blasted Job!

Well hello Mr. fancy-pants. I got news for you pal, you ain’t leading but two things right now… Jack and shit… and Jack left town.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store